Archive for May 28th, 2010
The Divining Wand’s Revealing Q & A
Questions from Larramie at The Divining Wand, a book blog that discovers authors “beyond their pages”!
Q: How would you describe your life in 8 words?
A: Pamela: A beautiful adventure and unpredictable work-in-progress.
Carey: Full, and fascinating — at least to me.
Beth: Simultaneously predictable and spontaneous, which is great.
Q: What is your motto or maxim?
A: Pamela: Do what you love, and everything else follows.
Carey: The currency of love is time.
Beth: Keep your eyes open, there’s a lot to see.
Q: How would you describe perfect happiness?
A: Pamela: Simplicity. Being in my fiance’s arms. Holding my daughter in mine.
Carey: Attainable only in brief moments.
Beth: Being outside with family and friends on a 74 degree day while the rest of the world is at peace, too.
Q: What’s your greatest fear?
A: Pamela: Losing someone I love. Or being lost to them.
Carey: Harm to my children.
Beth: Danger or harm to my child.
Q: If you could be anywhere in the world right now, where would you choose to be?
A: Pamela: Hiking in New Zealand.
Carey: In an alpine forest.
Beth: It’s Saturday morning, my son’s in the bathtub, the sun is shining, the sky is blue, I can hear birds and we’re going to go hang signs for a yard sale. Right here is fine. Somewhere in Yosemite would be great, too.
Q: With whom in history do you most identify?
A: Pamela: Explorers and female writers, including Rebecca West for some things: her intellectual curiosity, love of travel, writing, and independence. (But not for other things, including her troubled relationship with her son.)
Carey: Women; refugees; writers.
Beth: My grandmother, who knew that we often need to fight for what we want, but that grace can be a part of our struggles.
Q: Which living person do you most admire?
A: Pamela: Anyone who helps someone in need without being asked.
Carey: My dad.
Beth: An San Su Kyi
Q: What are your most overused words or phrases?
A: Pamela: Lately, “What do you say?” to my toddler as we encourage her to say “Please” and “Thank you”
Carey: “Lovely”
Beth: “Cool.” “What?”
Q: If you could acquire any talent, what would it be?
A: Pamela: To sing. On key.
Carey: Math.
Beth: Singing well.
Q: What is your greatest achievement?
A: Pamela: My daughter, though her achievements will be hers alone.
Carey: My whole written oeuvre and, to the extent it can be called my achievement, my family.
Beth: Optimism.
Q: What’s your greatest flaw?
A: Pamela: Impatience, impatience, impatience.
Carey: Impatience? Laziness? There are so many to choose from!
Beth: Envy.
Q: What’s your best quality?
A: Pamela: Maybe that I wouldn’t say I have a “best” anything.
Carey: Perhaps some kind of emotional fluency?
Beth: Humor.
Q: What do you regret most?
A: Pamela: That I didn’t find Mark earlier.
Carey: Not having more time with my mother.
Beth: Losing my temper.
Q: If you could be any person or thing, who or what would it be?
A: Pamela: Anything in my daughter’s orbit.
Carey: A blossoming tree.
Beth: A superhero who could help save the world and stop big businesses like BP from doing such stupid things.
Q: What trait is most noticeable about you?
A: Pamela: My laugh has been compared to a pig hunting for truffles.
Carey: Frequent smiling?
Beth: Independence.
Q: Who is your favorite fictional hero?
A: Pamela: Curious George, at the moment
Carey: Meg in a “Wrinkle in Time”
Beth: Elizabeth Bennett, “Pride and Prejudice”
Q: Who is your favorite fictional villain?
A: Pamela: The Wicked Witch of the West
Carey: “It” in a “Wrinkle in Time”
Beth: George Hustwood from “Sister Carrie”
Q: If you could meet any athlete, who would it be and what would you say to him or her?
A: Pamela: Olga Korbut. “What is your most treasured memory as a young gymnast?”
Carey: I just don’t speak Sports!
Beth: Billy Jean King. “How did it feel when you knew you’d beaten Bobby Riggs?”
Q: What is your biggest pet peeve?
A: Pamela: In the small picture, people who toss cigarette butts out of car windows. In the big picture, a lack of generosity of spirit.
Carey: Gratuitous meanness in any context.
Beth: Mean people.
Q:What is your favorite occupation, when you’re not writing?
A: Pamela: Being a mom, potter, and traveler.
Carey: Exploring in any form.
Beth: My old job, teaching stress resiliency to kids and teachers.
Q: What’s your fantasy profession?
A: Pamela: Author. This is it.
Carey: I wish I could wave a wand and be great at Information Technology.
Beth: Being a writer who knows that millions of people will read what I write, and while my writing will elicit controversy, it will always be enjoyed.
Q: What 3 personal qualities are most important to you?
A: Pamela: Integrity, compassion, and an open heart.
Carey: (no answer)
Beth: Honesty, humor, deep ability to love.
Q: If you could eat only one thing for the rest of your days, what would it be?
A: Pamela: Depends — either fresh fruit or coffee ice cream.
Carey: Salad (really! but with yummy dressings…)
Beth: Fruit and vegetable salad
Q: What are your 5 favorite songs?
A: Pamela: This is nearly impossible for me. I live in the city with the world’s greatest radio station – WXRT – and began in radio myself. I love music as much as books. But forced to answer, my favorite songs would include:
1. Boston: Peace of Mind
2. Rickie Lee Jones: We Belong Together
3. David Bowie: Life on Mars?
4. Billy Joel: Summer Highland Falls
5. New Order: True Faith
(runner-ups: Chaka Khan “Ain’t Nobody”; Dire Straits “Telegraph Road”; Bruce Springsteen “The River”; Rolling Stones “Beast of Burden”; Tom Petty “American Girl”; and Tori Amos “A Sorta Fairytale”; The Who “Baba O’Riley”)
Carey:
1. “You Me and the Bourgeoisie” by the Submarines
2. “Feeling Groovy” by Big Jim’s Ego
3. “Who Knows Where The Times Goes” by Judy Collins
4. “Falling Slowly” from the movie “Once”
Beth:
“Space Oddity” by David Bowie
O-o-h Child by The Five Stairsteps
“Good Day Sunshine” by The Beatles
Q: What are your 5 favorite books of all time?
A: Pamela: I hate to play favorites, but some of the books I keep going back to are:
“Romeo & Juliet” by William Shakespeare
“The Lord of the Rings” by J.R.R. Tolkien
“Mrs. Frisby and The Rats of NIMH” by Robert C. O’Brien
“The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier & Clay” by Michael Chabon
“The Selected Poetry of Rainer Maria Rilke”
Carey: Too hard!! But I’m in the phase of rereading old favorites to my children, and have recently discovered or rediscovered:
“The Phantom Tollbooth” by Norton Juster
“James and the Giant Peach” by Roald Dahl
“A Wrinkle in Time” by Madeleine L’Engle
and the newer “If I Reach You” by Rebecca Stead.
Beth:
“Sister Carrie” by Theodore Dreiser
“Of Men and Fire” by Norman Maclean
“Busy, Busy World” by Richard Scarry
“Love Poems” by Pablo Neruda
“Collected Poems” by James Wright
Great review from LifeofaModernMom.com
Debbie blogs:
“This book was a true sisterhood tale of friendship, love, and family. I was personally drawn into each women’s life as they searched for love and motherhood. I read Three Wishes in about three days, it kept me captivated through the authors unfolding friendships, and the trials in the pursuit of happiness and childbirth. The book was made even more touching by how the women were so open and candid that you felt as if you were listening to your best friend talk about the intimate details of her life. Each chapter opens with a bit of dialogue between the three friends, and then goes deeper into each story of their work, trying to find love, and of course their quest for motherhood. This book brought back the joy and love you felt when your child was first born, and how much love a family and friendship can bring to your life.”
The Roar Series
Thanks to Jennifer Brown Banks for including me as one of 10 women bloggers featured on her site for National Women’s History Month. You can find the entry below and follow her blog at http://penandprosper.blogspot.com/
For years, I had succeeded at work as a journalist for leading daily newspapers – The Washington Post, The Boston Globe, The Miami Herald. More importantly, I enjoyed it: the craft of writing, the adrenaline rush of covering deadline events from elections to hurricanes, and the hope of making a difference in someone’s life or the well-being of an entire community.
And yet, well into my 30s, I was a failure at love. Falling for men who either couldn’t commit or just couldn’t commit to me, I yearned for my soulmate even as girlfriends mocked me as a hopeless romantic. I also wanted a child and knew my time was running out. In each other’s down moments, my girlfriends and I reached into the Hat of Hopeful Stories—the coworker who met her husband on the commuter train, the neighbor who had her first child at 44. Finally, as I neared 40 and another relationship collapsed, I didn’t give up on love entirely but I decided to take motherhood into my own hands.
One of my friends, Carey, had already taken the bold step of buying donor sperm when she turned 40 and her own biological deadline for becoming a mother struck. What she found was not a father in a vial, but a sort of magic potion. She met a man, fell in love, and got pregnant the old-fashioned way. She passed the vials to our friend Beth, and it happened again. Beth met a man, fell in love, and got pregnant. Beth passed the vials to me. Magic struck again. There were setbacks and disappointments, but discovering love and becoming a mother ultimately meant for me that I had found happiness and success in my personal life as well as my work.
Not only that, but I had done it in my own way, on my own terms, and with the unyielding support and encouragement of women friends.
